two words
by psychicchameleon
Summary: "Because when the end of the world came Tony Stark could only manage two words." / two-shot
1. Chapter 1

**an: so this is a short little five-minute attempt at a stream of consciousness, because I feel like all the writers I aspire to be have this kind of poetic-like rhythm to their fics, and I needed to dip my toes in and see where I want to go with this. Because I'm, like, crazy jealous of how wonderful their stories are. Please be nice, hopefully I'll get better as I do more of this.**

Two words.

When Peter Parker turned into nothing more than a blur of ash in a gust of wind on a planet that was nothing more than one big desolate wasteland only two words left Tony Stark's mouth.

He didn't say _stay with me_ (because in his defense those words seem too trite anyway).

He didn't say _I've got you_ (because he didn't have him).

He didn't say _I won't leave you_ (because we don't make promises we can't keep).

There was no hollow, shattered scream of anguish.

There was no burning, fiery, vehement stream of expletives.

Just a stunned silence and a pair of wide-eyes on a bleeding face and two words.

 _You're alright_.

Two words.

One monumental lie.

Peter Parker was not alright, would maybe never be alright ever again.

And the last two words he heard from Tony Stark were _you're alright._

Tony laughed. Then screamed. Then smashed his bare hand into the metal of his suit.

His stupid, fucking suit.

The suit that housed the man who said Peter Parker would be _alright_ when he was anything but alright.

The suit that housed the man who wasn't enough to defeat Thanos.

The suit that made the man inside a superhero. The suit was one big fucking lie too.

There were a million things Tony should have said.

 _I won't let you go_ (when the kid said "Mr. Stark I don't want to go.)

 _This isn't your fault_ (when the kid said "I'm sorry").

 _I'm so proud of you. I won't stop fighting for you. I'll make this right, I swear to you._

Because he meant all of those things. He just didn't _say_ them.

Peter Parker had held his shoulders so tightly, as if the grip of his fingers could pull harder than the grip of death.

And for a second, it did. Until it didn't.

And then a child crumbled to nothingness in his arms and he still didn't _say_ anything.

He just stood and stared blankly as the world crumbled to ash around and him and _god_ if that wasn't a metaphor for so much of his life.

And now Peter was gone and he was alone and there was nothing to _say_ anymore.

Because the worst had come and gone and Tony had let it happen with only two words of protest.

 _You're alright._

He wished he'd just died in a cloud of ash like Peter but that didn't happen (because life isn't fair).

And now the only thing he heard ringing in his ears were the two words that were supposed to be enough for Peter.

 _You're alright._

The words repeated over and over and over in a sick twist of irony.

 _You're alright. You're alright. You're alright._

Because, like Peter, he wasn't alright.

He might never be alright again.

And it was only fitting that he was cursed to hear the same lie he told Peter.

Again and again.

Because life has a funny sense of balance.

And a twisted sense of humor.

Because when the end of the world came Tony Stark could only manage two words.


	2. Chapter 2

**an: so this is the same scene, but through Peter's perspective. Let me know what you think (also I'm sorry if you cried last chapter—I'd say I didn't mean to make you cry... but...)**

 _I'm sorry._

I'm sorry that the first time I hugged you we weren't there yet.

And I'm sorry that the last time I hugged you I was already gone.

 _I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry._

Because I should have pulled harder on that gauntlet when I had it in my hands.

Because I should have gone home when you'd given me the chance.

Because we never really talked about what _this_ was.

Who I was to you.

Who you were to me.

Past tense, because I'm fading away and you're staying right there and it had to be this way.

But I'm still sorry (because at the end of the day you shouldn't have to feel someone you love crumble under your fingertips).

I'm sorry (because I know this will live on your conscience even when everything else is dead).

I'm sorry that my name is now carved on a marble headstone that weighs down your heart.

I'm sorry that my name isn't the only one (because your soul has become a graveyard of loss).

You've lost so much, and I'm sorry.

You're going to lose more, and I'm sorry for that too.

They say everything happens for a reason (but that doesn't mean it has to be a good one).

They say God gives the toughest battles to the strongest people (but that doesn't mean they'll win them).

I'm sorry that you offered me a place on your team (because I wanted it).

I'm sorry you offered me a place in your heart (because I needed it).

And I'm so much sorrier that I took it.

I'm sorry that the good die young.

And that the best of us live until we're old and gray and broken.

I'm sorry that I'm gone.

And I'm sorry that you're not.

Because dying is easy.

But living is harder.

I'm sorry for being selfish.

Because I didn't want to go.

But you always have.

Because, for you, the only thing worse than collapsing into a heap of dust is watching while everyone else does.

I'm sorry that I was supposed to be your legacy (because now your legacy has been reduced to a gust of ash blowing in the breeze of a desolate planet).

For dust you are.

And to dust you shall return.

But you don't get to go home yet.

You don't get to rest, yet.

This world may always need you.

Because you're earth's greatest defender.

Because you're my greatest defender.

We still need you alive.

Even if you're not really living.

And I'm so, so _sorry._


End file.
